Madness and Joy

On most days I can control,
What I order, my heart does.
In those moments in the time river,
A more insensitive soul, there never was.
But this night I cannot force my volition.
A banshee’s cry it will not heed
With shameless abandon it will overflow.
With anguish woeful, it will bleed.
Again tonight, I’ve blown a gasket.
So gallantly to the gallows I’ve marched
The heavens cracked, to drench my gardens,
Where I walk alone, dry and parched.
No will can bend my heart this night.
Nothing can console the tremors
No strength can hold my souls resolve
As soon as I conjure a smile to appear,
Hell lets loose its screamers
No forte I have with myself this present,
No hope I hold it will listen.
I urge it to sing a joyful song.
Only ballads of love come pouring,
And those hapless tears so glisten.
(Excerpt from poem: No will can bend my heart)